Doubt. Lack of confidence. Fake news. deception. “Smoke and mirrors.” Clickbait. With everything indicating the information and misleading information around us, it is no wonder that we have not been confident. While most people talk freely about their doubts about the media, politics and science at home, the lack of confidence in our institutions has begun to appear at work.

When we do not feel that our president is the next to the demobilization of workers, we do not trust their leadership. When our colleague fails to complete the deliveries in the project, we challenge their commitment to their work. When our direct report talks negatively about our management style behind our back, we doubt their loyalty. Lack of confidence is one of the most toxic and unhealthy environments to flourish, personally and professionally.

What does it appear, do not say, “I mean?

It is easy to tell someone you have to appear, and you will secure it or help him when the times become difficult. It is easy to say, “If you need anything, tell me” when someone is struggling to take care of. But when you fail to do what you promised, precious confidence is eroded.

Pressure is escalated in all industries, companies and jobs today to support promises and obligations and honor what is offered. Certainly, the army taught how important it is to honor what it is saying and adhering to, but in the civil world, we began to see the employees pressure to take action from the leaders who claim something, but their actions appear another.

Here is how the phrase “offer, do not be told” is used in some environments:

• In business, we may support claims in a “view, do not tell” way. For example, instead of insisting that customers love our products, we offer specific situations as our happiest products are our customers, which leads to increased sales and customer loyalty.
• In leadership, we ask our presidents to tell us what they support, then support this by living in agreement with their vision and values. We press to prove that what they say is what they mean by searching for evidence of consistency.
• In telling stories or writing, “The offer, do not tell” indicates how important the characters that show the traits that are appointed to them and develop their value to the Earth line.

How to show our intentions

The challenge in making promises or major data is that no one can know what it means to say. I can hear the words you say and feel the effect of your statement, but I can’t know if your motivation is in line with your actions unless you tell me. Just you can find out what you hope or mean doing, and whether it happened or not.

As such, when you provide a promise and fail to support it, I cannot know what it means to you. I just test the impact of failed expectations on my work.

Does this mean that we should stop making promises and setting expectations? Of course not. But we must bear in mind that our words carry a lot of weight. Our words, which match our actions, build confidence and enable others to rely on us. For example, if I tell you that honesty is important for me and you see me talking to my frankness to my colleagues, direct reports, Boss and others, then you start confidence in that when I defend honesty. You know that I mean. When we tell people what is important to us, then they see that we live accordingly, they trust.

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